Episode 6

05 - Chalky-Walky-Flabby-Pon

Blabbering: Babies!

Episode 5 - Back to work (or at being in the office) and growing geniuses who aren't Pokémon possessed.

The emotional rollercoaster that was Moonbeam's tongue-tie procedure, blending care with concern. A peek into the bittersweet blend of returning to work, juggling professional priorities and home life hilarity.

Also can genius be nurtured and will it be through a Pokemon or food obsession, Tilly creates her own Pokemon 'Chalky-Walky-Flabby-Pon' Tilly's post-partum pelvic floor workout is also discuss in more highs, lows, and funny's.

If you enjoyed this episode please leave a rating and if you can muster a few words that would be great.

Transcript
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Welcome to this week of blabbering.

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What week are we on?

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Five.

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Yep, week number five.

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I thought it was a question of five.

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Tilly: Yeah, how old's our daughter?

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She's five weeks

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Dan 1: out.

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So, what do we have for food this week?

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Tilly: Today, at the request

of you, we've got noodlies.

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We've got crispy pork noodles.

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I could come up with some sexier name

for them, but they're not too saucy.

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You don't want them too saucy,

you want them more chow mein y.

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That's what I went for.

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And then we've got nutty caramel pudding.

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Mm, mm,

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Dan 1: mm.

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And what are we eating it

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Tilly: out of?

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Tupperware, it's because we're

classy and there's not a sound

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of plates, it's annoying you.

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So now, this is what we have.

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We've got plastic Tupperware.

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I've got metal cutlery.

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Because you didn't want the children

cutlery, because it's too small and

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you couldn't put enough in your mouth.

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Dan 1: See, what I really want

is just normal plates, but

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normal size plastic cutlery.

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I'm really

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Tilly: good about it.

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I do have some somewhere

from camping and stuff.

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See, smaller apples, you've already

seen how It's not what a mouth does.

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Yeah.

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And one day Dan will teach

you his technique of putting

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loads of food in his mouth.

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Dan 1: Always gulleting.

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Yeah, I manage to eat like a gull so

that I can consume a lot of food at once.

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Got a small mouth, but

an ambitious appetite.

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Desire to get food in my mouth.

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Tilly: So this week, you're back at work.

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And

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Dan 1: the tongue tie off.

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And the tongue tie off.

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Big week.

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Yeah, last week, both

those things were kind of

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Tilly: Well, we weren't sure we

were going to do it, were we?

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Because we were told not to

go for the tongue tie off.

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It wasn't necessary.

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So, after our appointment last week,

we said, she said that we didn't

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really need to go for the tongue tie

off operation because actually it

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wasn't going to improve it that much.

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We decided we'd go for all these other

methods of trying to, like, increase milk

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supply and different ways of feeding her.

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Which we did do, but she was still Bit

fussy and still needing quite a lot of

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formula to like fill her up enough And

so I decided actually let's just go for

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the tongue tie Procedure because she

was still struggling to feed unless the

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boob was completely full I once it sort

of like had the initial letdown she then

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start to struggle and so it's like So

it's still topper up quite a lot for me.

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I know it's nothing wrong with

formula I want to try and do

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as much possible from the boob.

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Yeah, and so it was on when

no Thursday we went in Yeah.

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Yeah.

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And she had, um, it was, and it was just,

it was very quick, but it was horrible.

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I really didn't like the

noises she was making.

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I was just screaming and her

fingers in my mouth, it sounded so,

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like, panicked just from crying.

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And I was just like, oh.

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But it was so quick.

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So speedy.

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I mean, I was feeling upset

for like a very small period of

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Dan 1: time.

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Well, like, the amount of time that she

was actually at risk of something going

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wrong was low, but the amount of time

that she was screaming was quite high,

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because they, they have to like force

the mouth open to have a look around.

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And so at that point she's obviously

feeling pretty invaded, gripping

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her head and opening her mouth.

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Yeah.

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Tilly: Where they squeeZ each

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Dan 1: other's hands and, and that

they, they agreed on how they were

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gonna do it and everything like that.

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And then literally she just takes the

scissors outta the sanitary pack, the

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peels that looks at the, the nurse holding

the baby agrees that they're ready to go.

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Just says a straight Yeah.

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I didn't watch clip.

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Pulls out.

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Done.

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It was literally like.

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Less than a sec, like probably a second of

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Tilly: actual Yeah, and then we

went straight in his door and put

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a straight on the boob and that's

because that stops the bleeding.

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Yeah.

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So we went straight through to the

other room and then there's a midwife

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there to help you with the feeding.

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They support your needs so she helps you.

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Straight on the boob, feeds for a

little bit and then take her off to

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check that she has stopped bleeding

and then you continue doing a feed.

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Dan 1: The big thing that all the midwives

seem to be pushing that we haven't,

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well, given that they repeat it, we

must not be doing, is that chin to tit.

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I do do chin to tit.

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Okay, I'm just saying that

every time we go to Well,

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Tilly: no, that's it, because

that's the important bit.

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So I always have her, tuck her in

so she's, like, because that's why I

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pull her in so tight, because when you

pull in her bum, it pulls her chin in.

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Yeah.

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And so I always tuck her,

her bum and her legs in.

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She's just so bloody long, I

sort of wrap her around my body.

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Yeah.

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Um, tuck her in, that

sort of brings her in.

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Yeah, so.

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She does do it, though, it's just

important as well, that they say it, that

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often they say that, yeah, chin, that's

it, because she is already doing it.

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Not because she

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Dan 1: needs to do it.

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Well, I know originally, for the, you

were, I used to try and put Push her

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onto you a bit more to feed and you

were like, no, no, you need to give her

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space And you've got a kind of like,

well you're push her head You're not

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meant to push her head, but you're meant

to push her neck so that her chin is on

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Tilly: Well, it's more you push here,

which is like her shoulders, don't

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Dan 1: push her neck, the shoulders

so that her chin is on the

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breast and then like What is it?

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Nose to nipple.

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Yeah, and then she'll lift her head.

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Yeah, although she doesn't.

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To find the nipple and then

start sucking But that way

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everything's like aligned and close.

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Yeah, which

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Tilly: is what she does do.

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Dan 1: Whereas you used to do the

Guantanamo Bay treatment The booby

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boarding, whereby you'd hold her out and

wait until she has a pig mouth and then

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you'd just thrust her on your breath.

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Just body slam nipple into the face.

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Sometimes it's just what you've got to do.

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And then she'd be like, ah, it's painful!

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I remember

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Tilly: when I did that, I remember

when she did small suction.

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She does it open mouth, it wasn't painful.

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Then she does that, then she's like

doing a really shallow suction, basically

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like sucking on the tip of my nipple.

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Really tightly.

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Dan 1: WWE treatment

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Tilly: is Which is why my

nipple ends up getting pinched.

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And looking sort of pointy.

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Dan 1: So maybe you can

teach the midwife cinemas.

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Cinemas?

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Seminars.

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Me?

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Yeah, the WWE treatment.

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Yeah, I obviously know enough.

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Well, I'm just saying, they

didn't tell us about that method.

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Tilly: I think it's

probably an official method.

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They did often shove her head on.

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That's why I started doing it,

because they were shoving her head on.

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Because they'd sort of, they'd sort

of go right, and they'd sort of

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just shove her head up to her boob.

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And I'd be like, oh, alright.

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Face to tit.

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Um, but it seems like since

then she is feeding better.

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Yeah.

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Which is good, like we've not

had to do anywhere near as much

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formula the past couple of days.

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Yeah.

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It's just been when

you've had her at night.

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Yeah, formula at night time.

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She's had probably one or two bottles.

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So, your first week back to

work, how did you find it?

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Dan 1: Is that all we're going to

talk about in terms of the tit stuff?

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No, we'll get back to it.

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Okay.

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So, I guess, it was, what's that

stupid fucking Anagram for fear.

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Future expectations

appearing real or something.

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For like, why people get

stressed or worried about stuff.

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I've not heard of that.

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Oh, there's something better

than that, but never mind.

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Anyhow, shit chat.

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Sassy today.

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Tilly: When you get tired, you

become a sassy little missy.

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Dan 1: I definitely heard some

of that going on on Sunday.

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Like, I thought it was

going to be real bad.

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Real bleak.

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Well, not like bad as in

like My colleagues would be

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bad and that sort of stuff.

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I just, it's one of those

things that you're like, It's

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just gonna be such a slog.

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It's gonna take so long.

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Everything's gonna be so tiring.

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Everything's gonna be so arduous, and I'm

gonna have lots to do when I get back.

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Now, the first two things were

correct, but there wasn't loads to do.

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But I'm very fortunate in that my team

would be very kind and eased me in.

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So it was largely a day kind

of Having coffees, catching up,

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and just clearing down an inbox,

which is, which is quite nice.

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But the inbox is always a mammoth

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Tilly: when you come back

from being, having time off.

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Dan 1: Yeah, I had to get it down

from like, 350 down to like, 30.

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There was that many pointless

emails of just, internal nonsense.

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So, yeah, that was, so went in on that

Monday, and that bit, that was quite

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hard as well, because we, that was, that

was, we recorded the last episode on

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the Sunday, and so it was that night,

so, I went to sleep, what, ten till

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two, and then got up at two, and then

I was awake the whole time, wasn't I?

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From two through till I was going

to work, and then that evening

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we decided to switch it around to

try a different sleep pattern, and

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so then I was awake till eleven.

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So I had twenty one hours

of being awake, including.

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Commutes and work.

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I kept falling asleep on

the way in on the train.

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And I was pretty, pretty praying

that I'd, uh, miss my stop.

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I to do your alarm

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Tilly: thing.

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Was that different for the train?

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Dan 1: There are two, there

are three different things.

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There's, there's what I say I will do,

what I want to do, and what I actually do.

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That's like the, the iceberg in terms

of if I could want to do all the things

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that I say, I'd be doing pretty well.

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But if I could do all the things that

I want to do, I'd be so successful.

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I didn't realise it was difficult

to set an alarm on the train.

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No, I just forgot.

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Oh,

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Tilly: okay.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry,

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Dan 1: love.

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It's not that it was hard,

it's just that I forgot.

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Tilly: I thought you were going

to say something like, That's

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what I'm working towards.

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I'm

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Dan 1: working towards that lofty goal.

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Setting alarms.

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And

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Tilly: then you've been, have

you found working from home?

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Dan 1: I think that's

almost a bit harder, really.

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Because when you, not hard, well.

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It goes back to that kind of thing of

when you don't have much on you feel

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a bit guilty, but It's been again with

kind of the team easing me into it.

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There's just been easy admin stuff

So that's been quite good because

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it hasn't you know, I haven't had

to kind of lock myself away and be

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like go away I can't help you and

you and me and beam I've been able to

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Tilly: yeah They'll find it's just

I can give it to you for a little

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Dan 1: bit.

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Exactly.

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Yeah So it's been all right in that

regard It's been a bit weird because,

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you know, it's weird being so tired

and trying to work while being at home.

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Like I've always been somebody that

guards working at home as like proper

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work in terms of making sure that I

get up in good time, get showered,

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get changed, all these sorts of things

to try and give myself a bit of a

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positive mindset on work, like try and

detach it from normal kind of stuff.

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And it's very hard, you know,

it's a lot harder to do that.

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Tilly: I also think, we tried to

have, like, sort of, things we both

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wanted to get done before, sort

of, our day started, didn't we?

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And we got it, sort of, some days we

got stuff done, some days we didn't,

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Dan 1: I think we used to try

and I never got a new mind done.

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No.

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So maybe

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Tilly: that, that's what I'm

saying, maybe that needs to

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Dan 1: Yeah.

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Tilly: That would help

you get into the mindset.

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Yeah, definitely.

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Because, yeah, when you're

into the office, it's easy to

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Dan 1: get into the mindset because

you're in And then I also went

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in on Thursday, which was good.

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Both days were pretty good.

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Tilly: Yeah, like, you had a

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Dan 1: social on Thursday

as well, didn't you?

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Yeah, so It's naughty, stayed

out till What, left I think

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at about five past eight.

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Right back to, what, ten?

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Tilly: Oh.

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I know.

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Dan 1: Crazy.

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Somebody did actually comment.

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The partner actually commented, he was

like, Oh, I can't believe you managed

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to get a hall pass for this one.

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As I left at eight.

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I was like, it's not exactly

been an absolute wild one.

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Tilly: I'm such a chill partner.

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Also, back when he had his

kids, he probably had to

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Dan 1: be in the office five days a week.

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With my trade offers, I'm

only in two days a week.

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I think it

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Tilly: was alright the first week.

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I thought I'd find it harder.

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But it was alright.

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I definitely need to make sure

I'm out and about and like, doing

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stuff more, because on Thursdays

where I do that, she's much better.

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I think she likes to be out

and doing things and, well,

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she doesn't like it, but she's,

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Dan 1: she's better.

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Yeah, have a look round on the

calendar, because like, the

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cinema near us has a baby day.

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Yeah.

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There's also stuff

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Tilly: held on Tuesdays.

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Yeah, anyone just going for

like walks and stuff as well?

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Yeah.

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Just like, get some good

podcasts, listen to us.

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Listen

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Dan 1: to

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Tilly: yourself.

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Yeah.

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Meet up with people, not sure who.

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Dan 1: Make

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Tilly: some friends.

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Make some friends.

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Maybe I'll go on that, that peanut app.

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They keep me advertised for it.

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Is

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Dan 1: that Tinder

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Tilly: for mums?

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I'm not sure if it's

for dads as well or not.

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Or just mums.

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Dan 1: I feel like dads on

there will be looking for mums.

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I bet you they don't allow

like, Men looking, men trying

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to find new mum friends, it'll

be like dad finding dad friends.

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I wonder if there's like a little

gay corner of it, full of people who

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really fancy new dads, who are just

on there pretending to have a baby

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and trying to hunt out punky daddies.

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I

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Tilly: mean you're assuming there's not

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Dan 1: lesbians on there, I mean

There might be, just, there's not

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many women that straight after

childbirth like Get them a vag.

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Yeah, exactly.

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Yeah, same,

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Tilly: I Beansprouts leave me.

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Attractive.

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But I'm also like, I think that's an

absolutely great idea, but I'm also

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like, I don't want to be friends with

someone just because they're a mum.

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Dan 1: Yeah, it feels like a real

low level of filter, doesn't it?

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It's just a biological element.

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I'm not just friends with someone

because they're tall, you know,

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I'm also, I'm not like, oh,

you're also six foot, we're mates.

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That was

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Tilly: why people wanted me to date

you though, because we're both tall.

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They're like, you should

date Dan, he's tall.

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And I was like, oh yeah, bring it on.

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But then annoyingly it didn't work out.

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Dan 1: Annoying.

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Well, here we are.

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Sorry, Moonbeam.

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It's annoying that me

and your mum worked out.

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Tilly: Yeah, because we're tall.

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Only reason.

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Dan 1: Yeah, I get what you mean.

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It's like, it means that there's

such a wide amount of people to

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then sort through again at the

next level, if that makes sense.

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There are so many people who are mums.

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Yeah, and a lot of people are

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Tilly: boring.

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Yeah.

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You know, I meet people and so

often I'm like, you're nice,

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you're a nice person, but

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Dan 1: I guess you're going to have

bios and stuff, so you can just be

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very aggressive if you're swiping.

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Unless it's like, addicted to

cooking, you can just be like, no.

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Tilly: I don't, like, I don't have friends

who love cooking, my friends aren't cooks.

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It's not like I look for a person.

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Well,

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Dan 1: so here's an

interesting one for you.

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Okay.

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Let me just do you a huge

mouthful after saying that.

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So you know I was talking

about the chess prodigy girls?

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Yeah.

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So there's this guy called Laszlo Polga.

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Who was very good at chess, loved,

loved chess, and he wanted to create,

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he, he believed that he could raise

geniuses, because he believed that

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genius wasn't nature, it was nurtured,

they weren't bred, they were made.

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And he had three daughters, now

at the time, I don't think there

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were any female chess grandmasters.

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Yeah, that was, yeah.

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And he raised all three, all three of

his daughters became, I don't know if

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they all became chess grandmasters,

or they, but they were all like.

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They were basically number one, number

two, number three in the world for

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women, and I think that's what they

Incredibly high performing to a genius

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level and many of them beat men at a

time when chess was proliferated by

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men and Anyway, so I've been reading a

little bit on his little book on raising

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geniuses Now most people believe that

it's just gonna kind of be this extremely

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regimented Kind of like if you've seen

the film King Richard, whereby he just

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like bootcamps his daughters through it.

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But actually he talks about it and he's

like, the amount of practicing and the

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amount of effort that goes in, it cannot

be something that they don't enjoy.

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It has to be something that they enjoy.

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So the interesting thing then is he also

says that it has to be something that

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one of the parents is obsessed with.

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So there's not really that many

things that I would say are, I

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guess, career fields or lifetime

fields that I'm obsessed with.

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However, you're obsessed with food.

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So little Moonbeam could be a food genius.

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Tilly: Yeah.

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Dan 1: Moonbeam the food genius.

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Or just a real eater.

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Now

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Tilly: that I'm obsessed with.

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Yeah, so, one of them.

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No, she'll be like, she'll

just have an amazing palate.

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Dan 1: Maybe, but it does make me think,

can I make myself obsessed with something?

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And if I do what I want it

to be, but then it kind of.

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It seems like you're

making it too forceful.

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Yeah, it's very contrived then, isn't it?

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And it's also kind of, you're going to

have to try and practice this with your

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daughter for like 15, 16 years minimum.

398

:

And if it's not something that you

do know that you are, you know,

399

:

it should definitely be something

that you're obsessed about before.

400

:

So you can just double

down on your obsession of.

401

:

Unfortunately, the Pokemon

trading card game app doesn't cut

402

:

Tilly: it.

403

:

Pokemon or cooking?

404

:

Dan 1: I did used to work with

somebody who used to go around the

405

:

world representing South Africa

in the Pokemon trading card game.

406

:

Is that a thing?

407

:

Yeah, yeah, there's world tournaments.

408

:

Yeah, yeah, and you have

countries and stuff.

409

:

Are I mean, he gave off those

vibes, but Yeah, not surprised.

410

:

Hours later, after explaining

all the intricacies of Pokemon,

411

:

Tilly: Why, if there's, if there exists

a card you can use them, why are they

412

:

Dan 1: illegal?

413

:

Because over time they've recognised

that the way those cards interact

414

:

with other cards is either too

powerful or does things that shouldn't

415

:

and therefore And now there's like

416

:

Tilly: a controlling

league that's like, no.

417

:

You know, shocky wocky flabby pong.

418

:

Dan 1: So yeah, I'd have to

amass quite a lot of cards.

419

:

I reckon the world champs probably

have a thousand odd cards or

420

:

so, just shuffling them out.

421

:

So back to what we were saying,

I don't think The Obsession.

422

:

Probably shouldn't be Pokemon cards.

423

:

I don't know.

424

:

Otherwise, also.

425

:

I don't want to raise a daughter

who's obsessed with Pokemon cards.

426

:

No, I don't want to raise a

daughter who's in I don't want

427

:

Tilly: to raise any child, if she's

a son or a daughter, it don't matter.

428

:

I don't want to raise a kid

who's obsessed with Pokemon

429

:

Dan 1: cards.

430

:

No, but I think there's

those sorts of nerdy circles.

431

:

Suit boys a bit better than suit

Because otherwise Because at

432

:

first, there's just too many boys.

433

:

And so, you end up with these, like, girls

in the geek group who have all the boys,

434

:

kind of, chasing for their attention.

435

:

Yeah.

436

:

And then I remember those girls.

437

:

And they're in it because they love

the attention, but at the same time

438

:

it's like this is a really weird

experience for you growing up.

439

:

This isn't how any, like, any of

the rest of your life's gonna be

440

:

unless you just keep to these,

like, not fully matured circles.

441

:

In

442

:

Tilly: a selfish way, I'd like my kids to

have friends that I like and get on with.

443

:

It was the thing, if they're

all a Pokémon, you, like,

444

:

shut it and say, be like

445

:

Dan 1: Well, I think you want

your kids to, well, you want your

446

:

kids friends to help them kind of

Take appropriate risks and grow.

447

:

Tilly: That's what I want, yes.

448

:

Selfishly, but part of me,

I want some specific friends

449

:

Dan 1: that I like.

450

:

Yeah, I know, but I'm saying

that those are the sort of

451

:

people that you're attracted to.

452

:

And now, I'm sorry all my Pokemon

friends, let's be honest, sitting

453

:

in a basement playing a card game.

454

:

A lot of these games, I've been to a few

of the card clubs and been like, maybe

455

:

I'll come down on Sundays and play.

456

:

And you walk in, and it is a basement.

457

:

And it's, it's full of Does

458

:

Tilly: it smell like salt and vinegar?

459

:

Because like, soft play areas

always smell like salt and vinegar.

460

:

And that's what I imagine a

basement would smell like.

461

:

Dan 1: No, but it's odd.

462

:

It's always a basement.

463

:

It's always like those

incredibly intense white lights.

464

:

The walls are white.

465

:

And there's, and it's just people there.

466

:

And it, um, you know People?

467

:

I'm glad they've got a Fine.

468

:

Blokes.

469

:

I'm glad that they've

got a little community.

470

:

But I do think to myself

I hope you outgrow this

471

:

community within the next year.

472

:

Because otherwise you're just going

to kind of spend your life Doing

473

:

stuff that's not really, I wouldn't

say it's that enriching as it were.

474

:

Well it's very

475

:

Tilly: insular as well isn't it?

476

:

Yeah.

477

:

You're not really participating

in the real world.

478

:

No.

479

:

It's like people spend too,

too long on video games.

480

:

Like a bit of video

games are fine, isn't it?

481

:

Whatever.

482

:

People who spend too much time

not being in the real world.

483

:

Well almost

484

:

Dan 1: too much time in anything.

485

:

There's very few things that have enough

broad range inputs that you could say

486

:

Tilly: Yeah, but I guess if you're

doing a sport that you've met lots of

487

:

different people all the time in Yeah.

488

:

For me that's enough of an involvement

in the real world with other people.

489

:

Dan 1: So cooking it is Moonbeam, you're

490

:

Tilly: not allowed to be a

Pokemon training card game genius.

491

:

But I'll try to make friends

492

:

Dan 1: with you.

493

:

Everyone likes eating.

494

:

Yeah, I was gonna say, turn

up with food and everyone's

495

:

gonna bully you but love you.

496

:

I never got bullied.

497

:

Did you turn up to school with food?

498

:

Tilly: To school?

499

:

Four people?

500

:

Sometimes.

501

:

My friends.

502

:

First trying out a new recipe.

503

:

But I'd also host dinner

parties when I was like 13.

504

:

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

505

:

Dan 1: It's alright Pokemon

people, you're back.

506

:

It's alright.

507

:

You don't seem that bad no more.

508

:

It's my 13 year old going

on 40 year old over here.

509

:

Tilly: Hey, I was friends

with the cool peeps.

510

:

Dan 1: They were just using you to get

511

:

Tilly: you food.

512

:

Cool peeps eat too.

513

:

What am I saying?

514

:

I'm just I'm just such a lovely person.

515

:

I used to have my, like,

what was it called?

516

:

Galentines or whatever it is.

517

:

Your friendship valentines.

518

:

I used to do a dinner

party for that each year.

519

:

I'd put on my single peeps over.

520

:

Obviously I was single every year.

521

:

I was single every year

until I was with you.

522

:

And we'd have a nice big, big old dinner.

523

:

I'd always bring food to a house party.

524

:

Because I think it's rude to

go anywhere without anything.

525

:

People always appreciated it.

526

:

You've had a house party.

527

:

No one expects you to bring them a gift.

528

:

Dan 1: I completely agree.

529

:

And also, people are always hungry at a

house party because they've been drinking.

530

:

But it's just I wouldn't necessarily

feel the correct degree of appreciation.

531

:

If I'd rocked up at some of the house

parties that I went to, with some food

532

:

that I'd made and just watched drunk

people, drunk people obliterate it.

533

:

You don't.

534

:

It's a Sunday

535

:

Tilly: drink for them

to have the next day.

536

:

So you just go to them and you put

it in their fridge or something.

537

:

Ah.

538

:

Or it's like a box of biscuits and you

just put it in the cupboard for them.

539

:

You know.

540

:

It's not necessarily something

you're giving to the party,

541

:

you're giving it to the host.

542

:

Although one time I was, I did get upset,

I told you this the other day when I

543

:

made my friend this beautiful cake for

her birthday, it was her birthday party.

544

:

I was like, I'll make you a

birthday cake, and I spent ages.

545

:

It was like, this rich chocolate cake, I

did like an orange mascarpone buttercream,

546

:

I made my own chocolate marzipan.

547

:

Ah, it was stunning.

548

:

It had six layers.

549

:

Beautiful cake.

550

:

Brought it over.

551

:

Obviously arrived a bit late because

the cake took me fucking ages.

552

:

Dan 1: Oh, and you don't like

being late either, so Nah, to a

553

:

Tilly: house party I was alright,

because it's not like a set time.

554

:

You don't want to arrive at the start

because it's always awkward, isn't it?

555

:

Start the party, a little bit shit.

556

:

Um, and I arrived,

everyone was quite drunk.

557

:

I gave, it was my friend Katie.

558

:

I gave her the cake.

559

:

She was really happy

with it, we did all that.

560

:

We did the, the candles, lovely jubbly.

561

:

You know, she was, she

was very appreciative.

562

:

But then, Greg.

563

:

Sweet.

564

:

Fucking.

565

:

Greg.

566

:

Came in, and decided it would be

a great idea to punch my cake.

567

:

Dan 1: Yeah, there's always

gonna be someone like that.

568

:

Tilly: That's the other thing.

569

:

I think that's what you would have been.

570

:

I think here's what you would have been.

571

:

As I tell the story now, I'm like, I could

see you doing that when you were younger.

572

:

Dan 1: Yeah,

573

:

Tilly: potentially.

574

:

I'd have to know.

575

:

You wouldn't have realised how much of a

576

:

Dan 1: dick and move it was.

577

:

If I knew the person whose

birthday it was, well enough, yeah.

578

:

Yeah, that could be me.

579

:

I, my friends never had

loose enough parents.

580

:

to know the person hosting that

well, if you know what I mean,

581

:

the people that I was close to.

582

:

Tilly: So your boys never

583

:

Dan 1: hosted parties?

584

:

No.

585

:

No.

586

:

Like, you know, think about,

my mum wasn't going to.

587

:

Well obviously your mum wasn't going to.

588

:

No.

589

:

Hey mum!

590

:

And like, how was it?

591

:

Linda's not, Linda's pretty strict.

592

:

Lisa I was going to

593

:

Tilly: say, what you said about Lisa

I could imagine, she'd be, apparently

594

:

like host it, but like stay there maybe.

595

:

Dan 1: Yeah, but I don't think

Will would want to deal with Lisa

596

:

requiring me to clean everything out.

597

:

I think it'd be like, you can, I'm here,

and we'll all be very embarrassed by

598

:

that in the first place, and then I'm

going to hold the house to a standard

599

:

that you've got to then upkeep.

600

:

Tilly: I mean, that was a downside

to whenever you host a party,

601

:

is cleaning up the next day.

602

:

It's fucking grim.

603

:

Because when you're a teenager,

you're, you're a grotbag, aren't you?

604

:

You're horrible.

605

:

At a house party, you don't give a shit.

606

:

And it gets so gross.

607

:

And that me and Jess were trying

to have, like, secret house parties

608

:

when mum and pops were away.

609

:

They always knew we'd had one, but

they always pretended they didn't

610

:

realise, which is very kind of

them, to let us feel like we had.

611

:

Revelled.

612

:

Even though they knew we'd had a party.

613

:

And yeah, cleaning up after

those parties was, ugh.

614

:

Yeah.

615

:

Dan 1: Uh, actually, Duncan

Yeah, Duncan had one.

616

:

Duncan had a few.

617

:

Duncan had a few at his mum's.

618

:

Nice.

619

:

Yeah.

620

:

Sausage fest.

621

:

Real sausage fest.

622

:

That was also the party that

someone was sat on the toilet.

623

:

With a bowl, shitting and

vomiting at the same time.

624

:

As you can tell, full

of girls at this party.

625

:

Tilly: If they were,

you're all getting laid.

626

:

Dan 1: Just Me, downing 400ml of

vodka to then chunder and then

627

:

someone having to come in and

poo and chunder at the same time.

628

:

Yeah, it was good.

629

:

Good stuff.

630

:

Our

631

:

Tilly: parties were a lot

more mixed, if I'm honest.

632

:

Dan 1: Not to say I didn't

go to mixed parties, but none

633

:

of my friends hosted any.

634

:

I feel like you didn't, though.

635

:

Tilly: I just went to

little sausage fest parties.

636

:

Do you know, my parents would

always ask me, every time I went

637

:

up, I was going to a party, they'd

be like, will there be boys there?

638

:

And I was like, I don't go to a nunnery.

639

:

Of course there's going to be boys there.

640

:

Why would I just go to a

single sex, like, girls

641

:

Dan 1: party?

642

:

You not just having pillow fights?

643

:

No, funnily enough.

644

:

I did, and I would always be the

person who would end up staying over,

645

:

and because I always wake up early.

646

:

I would be the person who'd like clean up.

647

:

I, the, the mixed parties that I

went to I ended up making pancakes.

648

:

It's not bad reputation.

649

:

Because I, because I'd always wake

up at like six in the morning.

650

:

Oh, you haven't made me pancakes.

651

:

You haven't hosted me in a party,

oh you have hosted you in quite

652

:

Tilly: a few parties actually, very much.

653

:

Have I ever made you pancakes?

654

:

No.

655

:

No, you haven't had

656

:

Dan 1: that.

657

:

Fuck me, that's tragic, eh?

658

:

I've made you other things.

659

:

Almost nine, almost nine years.

660

:

Made you other things?

661

:

Better things than pancakes?

662

:

Just then.

663

:

Anyway, and also, I don't think the host

really liked it, because she'd come down

664

:

and I'd have just used everything in

her kitchen to make these pancakes, so

665

:

I'd have got rid of like the first layer

of mess, like the cans, the bottles,

666

:

the easy shit, and it would all be kind

of in the corner, to go out, and then

667

:

there'd be loads of washing up to do,

because I'd been mixing stuff up, Oh

668

:

yeah,

669

:

Tilly: if you're making food sometimes

you've got to do the cleaning up as well.

670

:

Nah.

671

:

Now

672

:

Dan 1: I'm making every I've cleaned

up everyone's base level of mess,

673

:

then I've made them fucking food.

674

:

They clean it up after me.

675

:

But it would also mean that I know how

676

:

Tilly: messy you are

677

:

Dan 1: when you cook.

678

:

But it would also mean that I would

get to experiment with other people's

679

:

ingredients, which I quite liked.

680

:

I think I had a Viennetta pancake.

681

:

Well, that's fair, because

everyone else was still sleeping.

682

:

I was like, well, fuck.

683

:

These pancakes are going stale.

684

:

Let's have a look at what

we've got going around.

685

:

So I cut up some

686

:

Tilly: Viennetta and put them in.

687

:

Oh, Viennetta.

688

:

I've not had Viennetta in years.

689

:

It's like a mint Viennetta as well.

690

:

Yeah, yeah.

691

:

Dan 1: Mint Viennetta in the pancake.

692

:

Still warm.

693

:

The pancake was still warm.

694

:

The

695

:

Tilly: plain Viennetta, was that, fair.

696

:

The strawberry did not like.

697

:

I

698

:

Dan 1: think I did that

two or three times.

699

:

Other times I'd just sleep in my

car, and then go home in the morning.

700

:

Because I live quite

far away, like a loner.

701

:

Tilly: Yeah, we always said to

me and Jess that we'd stay over.

702

:

Either at parties, at the party's

house, or like friends who live near.

703

:

Generally just friends who live

near, because you don't really want

704

:

to stay at the house party house.

705

:

No.

706

:

You want to get rinsed and

dusted with cleaning, generally.

707

:

If you're not having a party.

708

:

Dan 1: I never really minded

doing that first level of mess.

709

:

I didn't want to do like

the proper cleaning.

710

:

I think it's one of those things.

711

:

It's the easy win.

712

:

It is.

713

:

If you do

714

:

Tilly: it and it's like so grateful, but

you're like, actually I'm going to do

715

:

Dan 1: it again.

716

:

Exactly.

717

:

People think it's such a big

deal because they've just woken

718

:

up and they feel like shit.

719

:

Me and you are morning people and by

the time we wake up, it's like, let's

720

:

just fucking get on with this and it's

Like you say, it's not cleaning up sick.

721

:

It's not, you know, scrubbing the

walls for whatever's being spilt.

722

:

It's, it's literally just grab a few

bin bags, hurricane through that house,

723

:

put them in the corner, fuck off.

724

:

And everyone's like, oh

wow, I'm so grateful.

725

:

You're like, yeah, yeah, cheers, bye.

726

:

So that would be my recommended.

727

:

Tilly: Actually, I used to just

go straight to work most of the

728

:

time, that's what I remember doing.

729

:

I would take the early shift at work,

and I would just get a taxi to work

730

:

and just arrive at work still drunk.

731

:

Dan 1: Anyway, so, and uh,

probably, probably a good

732

:

amount of chat on this thing.

733

:

Let's get back to the

What, the actual baby chat?

734

:

Yeah, the actual baby chat.

735

:

Tilly: So that was, I'll

first put that down.

736

:

But

737

:

Dan 1: what I've got to ask is,

what is it that means that you

738

:

haven't shared our podcast yet?

739

:

Forgetfulness?

740

:

What are the reservations?

741

:

I don't believe you.

742

:

What's the reservations?

743

:

I don't believe you.

744

:

I ask, I ask you every day.

745

:

Tilly: Yeah, but you, I think you've

realised how scatty my brain is right now.

746

:

I don't remember anything.

747

:

I've got so many things I'm meant to

have done and I haven't done them.

748

:

This is one of many things.

749

:

Just grow it in a growing list.

750

:

Oh shit, I've not done.

751

:

There you go.

752

:

No reservations.

753

:

I've not listened to it.

754

:

I've got no idea what it's like.

755

:

I haven't listened to

756

:

Dan 1: it.

757

:

No, I know, but I mean it's in like

You just haven't told anybody yet.

758

:

Never mind.

759

:

Why do you

760

:

Tilly: think there's no

conspiracy behind this?

761

:

Because I just

762

:

Dan 1: feel like there must be some,

there must be some unconscious bias

763

:

there, and a sort of deep lurking

thought that means that you don't do it.

764

:

Because if I'd asked you like, if I've

asked you three times and you say,

765

:

yeah I'm gonna do it, there must be a

reason why you don't end up doing it.

766

:

Because I've sent you kind of like,

stuff to share and stuff like that.

767

:

Tilly: No, the thing you sent to say, I've

literally just keep forgetting to do it.

768

:

Yeah.

769

:

Yeah, no reservations darling.

770

:

Alright then, so I'll send

it, I'll send it right,

771

:

Dan 1: I'll send it right now.

772

:

No, don't do that, because

you're meant to be concentrating

773

:

on making the next episode.

774

:

Well, I will forget then.

775

:

Okay, I'll remind you straight

after the end of this episode.

776

:

That's fine.

777

:

I

778

:

Tilly: will.

779

:

There isn't some wide conspiracy.

780

:

There is.

781

:

It's just, it's

782

:

Dan 1: just.

783

:

You want to humiliate me.

784

:

It's just.

785

:

Have me share it

786

:

Tilly: all.

787

:

It's just baby brain.

788

:

You've got to be understanding.

789

:

I

790

:

Dan 1: am, but if I ask you like

three or four times and you don't do

791

:

it, I'm going to think that there's

a reason beyond just being tired.

792

:

Tilly: That's fair enough,

but at the moment, no.

793

:

It's beyond tiredness, it's that all

weird hormones and lots of mixture

794

:

of things that makes my brain mush.

795

:

If I was back to work

right now, I think I'd be.

796

:

Dan 1: So, also, at where I work,

we had a Global Values Week.

797

:

Which I missed, because I

was away on paternity leave.

798

:

And it transpired that one of the

people interviewed Jacinda Ardern,

799

:

the former New Zealand Prime Minister.

800

:

And I didn't realise the full extent of

it, but she gave birth during her term.

801

:

And it wasn't like she kind of took

that long off or did anything like that.

802

:

I'd seen news of it, but I

hadn't really fully processed it.

803

:

But she was pregnant during her term, she

was with newborn, all that sort of stuff.

804

:

Now, I'm sorry love, but you weren't high

functioning, let's say, towards the end.

805

:

You were pretty, pretty checked

out on your work in those

806

:

last, sort of, that last month.

807

:

Oh, I did loads of work.

808

:

No, no, you did loads of work.

809

:

But you were struggling to be

passionate about it, I guess.

810

:

Oh yeah.

811

:

Yeah.

812

:

And I feel like if you've got to

try and run a country through the

813

:

end of COVID, that would be rough.

814

:

Like, yeah, you did work, more work,

I keep telling you to stop doing

815

:

work, but like, you kind of, you were

816

:

Tilly: I didn't want to do

it necessarily, but I was

817

:

Dan 1: doing it.

818

:

And then also, imagine like, now.

819

:

Oh

820

:

Tilly: no, I think, fair play to it,

I definitely wouldn't want to do it.

821

:

I'm doing it wrong.

822

:

Like all these things, if I had

to, I would, and I could, because

823

:

you step up when you have to.

824

:

Yeah.

825

:

But, I wouldn't want to.

826

:

No.

827

:

I also wouldn't want to because I

wouldn't want to not be with Her all

828

:

the time and have her be my focus.

829

:

Like, it's nice being able to have

her be my sole focus because, you

830

:

know, she's the most amazing thing.

831

:

And it's a precious gift.

832

:

And I love being able to have

that time focusing on her.

833

:

But if I had to go back to work, I could

834

:

Dan 1: do it.

835

:

But also one of the things that's

quite interesting is, she pointed

836

:

out that people always come up to

her, women always come up to her

837

:

and say, Oh my, it's so amazing

that you've managed to have it all.

838

:

And then she kind of often corrects

them and sort of says, No, it

839

:

wasn't me that did this all.

840

:

You know, my husband's basically a full

time parent, incredibly supportive,

841

:

and obviously she's going to have,

like, people around her as well.

842

:

She's, she's the Prime Minister of New

843

:

Tilly: Zealand.

844

:

No, she's probably got help.

845

:

Well, yeah, no one ever does

anything by themselves, do they?

846

:

Dan 1: Well, you wouldn't

have got pregnant

847

:

Tilly: by yourself.

848

:

I definitely wouldn't have, no.

849

:

Um, no, you always have

to have a support network.

850

:

You can't do anything

by yourself, you know.

851

:

If I were to say I was too about to

work now You would need to do more,

852

:

like whether that meant you didn't

go to work, or whatever it was,

853

:

like You don't earn enough, love.

854

:

Well, no, I don't earn enough,

but if I, if I, if I did

855

:

Dan 1: If you earn a

hundred K, I'll, I'll, no.

856

:

If you earn a hundred and

fifty K, so, I'll, I'll retire.

857

:

I'll be full time dad.

858

:

I don't want

859

:

Tilly: either of us to do that.

860

:

I don't either of us want our

children to be our sole focus.

861

:

I didn't say they would be!

862

:

Dan 1: But that's what I would expect.

863

:

They'd be my prime focus, they

wouldn't be my sole focus.

864

:

Tilly: Um But yeah, that's how it has

to be, like, you know, like, when I go

865

:

back to work, you're not going to work.

866

:

Dan 1: Yeah, but that's also because

within the materned period, it's Yeah.

867

:

Like, within that nine month window.

868

:

Yeah.

869

:

Tilly: But it can be

shared, I'm just saying.

870

:

Yeah.

871

:

Generally, someone has to

do more in different areas.

872

:

And with that point, you know, she

won't be needing my boobies as much.

873

:

Well, she will for a while.

874

:

Dan 1: Do we have any other

points to discuss from the week?

875

:

Tilly: Oh, sorry, my

little nipple covers have I

876

:

Dan 1: guess this is, this is something

that we brought up in one of the beginning

877

:

episodes but haven't really updated on.

878

:

I think one of the first episodes you

had cabbage in your tit, didn't you?

879

:

Tilly: I did have cabbage.

880

:

I've upgraded from

Savoy cabbage to silver.

881

:

To silver!

882

:

Silver!

883

:

The silver nipple cupboard.

884

:

The tiny little bowls.

885

:

It's just tiny little silver balls

that just go onto my nipples.

886

:

And

887

:

Dan 1: you and your doorbell nips had

to go for the maxi size, didn't you?

888

:

I

889

:

Tilly: did, yeah.

890

:

But my nipples are

never not erect anymore.

891

:

I don't know if that stops after,

when you stop breastfeeding, or

892

:

that's just for the rest of my

life, just have erect nipples now.

893

:

But I've got like, a good sort of like,

centimetre, centimetre and a half.

894

:

Of boing!

895

:

Yeah.

896

:

Just out nipple, always.

897

:

It makes it really difficult when

I get out of the shower and I'm

898

:

drying myself, because when the

towel rubs over them I'm like, no!

899

:

So I have to shower I have to dry myself,

leaning forward like this So I'm bent

900

:

over, drying myself So the towel falls

away from my body So it doesn't go and

901

:

touch my nipples And then, to dry my

nipples, I just hold the towel And just

902

:

cup like this I just pat, pat dry my

boobies Just to avoid any rubbing On the

903

:

old nipples Savage Just another one of the

glamorous elements of early motherhood.

904

:

Dan 1: Yeah, anything more on your silver

oats versus cabbages, or are we done?

905

:

I think

906

:

Tilly: cabbage did help, but it did

make me smell cabbage y at a point

907

:

where I already feel like I smell weird.

908

:

And

909

:

Dan 1: surely it's like cabbage

y cheesy as well, it's not just

910

:

Tilly: cabbage y.

911

:

Yeah, I mean the boobie milk smell,

it's not cheesy as such, it's more

912

:

like acidic once you've been in there

a while, it's quite an acidic smell.

913

:

That's

914

:

Dan 1: an

915

:

Tilly: oddity, eh?

916

:

It's an acid y cabbage.

917

:

No, I think I was like it

could be like a weird band.

918

:

Hey, I said I were acid cabbage

919

:

Dan 1: What genre I think

definitely electro of some kind?

920

:

Yeah, or like like those bands that are

a band but verge on the electro version.

921

:

I mean that vegan electro

vegan Or just like that

922

:

Tilly: pious Like, they always

have a real, like, cool message

923

:

where it's like, Eat your greens!

924

:

While taking

925

:

Dan 1: acids!

926

:

Spiritual awakening healthy!

927

:

Tilly: Absolutely.

928

:

Mix some, like, LSD with your spirulina.

929

:

Dan 1: So you recommend

Silverettes above the cabbage?

930

:

Tilly: I think cabbage works

well, and definitely if you want

931

:

to be on a budget, much better.

932

:

I mean,

933

:

Dan 1: people say that, but they're

only like 30 quid, the silverettes.

934

:

Yeah, but I'm just saying.

935

:

Talking about 25 to 35.

936

:

Yeah, I guess there is a lot

of shit that you end up buying

937

:

when you first get a baby.

938

:

Yeah, cabbage is obviously much cheaper.

939

:

And it's not that high of a priority,

940

:

Tilly: so.

941

:

Um, and if you've got a dog,

942

:

Dan 1: you feed them to your dog.

943

:

So, my funny is probably Tuesday night,

when we were sleeping, and we were, so we

944

:

decided to try and do our split largely

in bed, or, no, how did we do the split?

945

:

Oh yeah, we did.

946

:

Two hours.

947

:

I, I was awake for nine till, eight

till eleven while you were in bed.

948

:

And then you were awake from eleven

till five while I was asleep.

949

:

And then you were asleep from five

till eight while I was awake for.

950

:

And we both spent, I spent my, much

of my six hours or however long it is.

951

:

Constantly waking up,

going, is it my turn?

952

:

And you also spent much of

your time constantly waking

953

:

up, going, is it my turn?

954

:

And I kept

955

:

Tilly: thinking I was hearing

you coming up the stairs,

956

:

because you were downstairs.

957

:

I kept thinking I was hearing

you walk up the stairs.

958

:

Dan 1: But I just love how we're so

tired, but yet, we just keep being like,

959

:

Oh, you need to go look after the baby.

960

:

I just find it so odd that

it's so, This obligation is so

961

:

Tilly: wired.

962

:

And also, we're just deeply

neurotic people anyway.

963

:

Dan 1: Yeah,

964

:

Tilly: well, yeah.

965

:

That combination.

966

:

Together, because we're going to be like,

we must make sure we're doing our part.

967

:

Yeah.

968

:

So you add that together,

969

:

Dan 1: beautiful mix.

970

:

But yeah, I keep waking up

being like, Is it my turn?

971

:

And you'd be like, no, go back to sleep.

972

:

And then when I came in to see you later

and I was like, Oh, how do you sleep?

973

:

And you're like, rubbish.

974

:

I kept thinking it was

my turn and waking up.

975

:

So there we were, trying to

create this brilliant sleeping

976

:

pattern and nope, not working.

977

:

No,

978

:

Tilly: I mean last night, at one

point, You didn't wake up too many

979

:

times actually when I heard her.

980

:

At one point, you're

like, have you got her?

981

:

I need to, I need to, I

need to go to the toilet.

982

:

I was like, what do you mean?

983

:

He's like, he's like, you're like,

can you, can you grab her, please?

984

:

And I was like, where,

where am I from, where?

985

:

She's in my arms.

986

:

And you thought she was

rolling around in the bed.

987

:

I was like, why would

I leave her in the bed?

988

:

Dan 1: You just let her roll

about the place, you free spirit.

989

:

Tilly: I was like, she's not

there, and you're like, really?

990

:

I was like, yeah, you

can, you can leave her in

991

:

Dan 1: the duvet.

992

:

And wasn't I like, fanning about with the

pillow at one point, thinking it was her?

993

:

That was a different

994

:

Tilly: day.

995

:

A different day you were cradling it.

996

:

Dan 1: Hahaha Was that the Tuesday night

997

:

Tilly: though?

998

:

I don't know, they all blur into one

999

:

Dan 1: darling.

:

00:40:41,247 --> 00:40:46,431

Oh yeah, so I, it was a weird one,

I thought I was looking after her,

:

00:40:46,431 --> 00:40:50,186

I thought the pillow was her, I was

cradling the pillow, then I realised

:

00:40:50,186 --> 00:40:53,461

the pillow wasn't her and then, oh,

it was all over the place that one.

:

00:40:53,798 --> 00:40:55,155

And you were just there laughing at me.

:

00:40:55,268 --> 00:40:55,778

Yeah, of course.

:

00:40:55,778 --> 00:40:56,135

Yeah,

:

00:40:56,135 --> 00:40:58,278

Tilly: I was all laughing at you.

:

00:40:58,359 --> 00:40:59,757

You said you didn't want a dating partner.

:

00:41:00,074 --> 00:41:00,359

No,

:

00:41:00,359 --> 00:41:04,686

Dan 1: I agree, but it's just when

you're there, basically having a

:

00:41:04,696 --> 00:41:07,660

breakdown and your partner's on

the other side of the bed laughing.

:

00:41:07,660 --> 00:41:10,074

I agree, that was the whole

message of this podcast, was

:

00:41:10,074 --> 00:41:12,574

Barrington's not going to be easy,

but let's at least laugh about it.

:

00:41:12,655 --> 00:41:13,176

Yeah,

:

00:41:14,104 --> 00:41:16,094

Tilly: like when you had to pick up

one of my blood clots from the floor.

:

00:41:16,788 --> 00:41:20,033

Dan 1: Yeah, just dropped a

blood clot in the bathroom.

:

00:41:20,859 --> 00:41:21,961

Straight out the fanny.

:

00:41:22,074 --> 00:41:24,145

Nice, big, juicy blood clot.

:

00:41:25,900 --> 00:41:26,380

Tilly: Beautiful.

:

00:41:27,701 --> 00:41:28,007

Beautiful.

:

00:41:28,497 --> 00:41:31,109

Bits of my body falling

out, it's dropping out.

:

00:41:32,660 --> 00:41:33,793

Thankfully past that stage now.

:

00:41:34,783 --> 00:41:35,783

No more blood clots are

dropping on the floor.

:

00:41:36,477 --> 00:41:39,395

Dan 1: So how about you, I'll

come back to my others, you choose

:

00:41:39,395 --> 00:41:40,620

one to go high, low or funny.

:

00:41:40,671 --> 00:41:42,001

Is that because you've not got any?

:

00:41:42,001 --> 00:41:43,109

I've got them, they're not great.

:

00:41:44,007 --> 00:41:45,150

Tilly: What's my high?

:

00:41:46,977 --> 00:41:48,293

I think yesterday was a really good day.

:

00:41:49,232 --> 00:41:50,956

I would say the whole of yesterday.

:

00:41:52,405 --> 00:41:52,997

Dan 1: Other than one

:

00:41:52,997 --> 00:41:53,691

Tilly: little bit, hey?

:

00:41:54,660 --> 00:41:56,007

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

:

00:41:56,222 --> 00:41:58,303

That, that's my low or

not, but that's not my low.

:

00:41:58,426 --> 00:42:00,936

But anyway, we spent the whole

day out, which, um, she had

:

00:42:00,936 --> 00:42:02,314

her longest day out yesterday.

:

00:42:02,314 --> 00:42:06,967

She, she was out for like, sort of 10

hours, drove over to my mom's, had a

:

00:42:06,967 --> 00:42:10,140

little coffee with my mom and then we

drove down to Bristol to see my granny.

:

00:42:10,140 --> 00:42:12,477

So her great granny

spent the day with her.

:

00:42:12,477 --> 00:42:13,058

She was really good.

:

00:42:13,058 --> 00:42:14,191

She's slept well.

:

00:42:14,191 --> 00:42:17,242

Fed well, was just generally

a charming little baby.

:

00:42:17,875 --> 00:42:19,742

Went back to mum's, got to see my sis.

:

00:42:20,711 --> 00:42:21,660

She was great again.

:

00:42:21,752 --> 00:42:22,273

Came back home.

:

00:42:22,273 --> 00:42:22,763

She's all good.

:

00:42:22,763 --> 00:42:24,109

She's fed well again, slept well.

:

00:42:24,109 --> 00:42:24,574

She was just generally.

:

00:42:25,645 --> 00:42:26,992

And nice baby today.

:

00:42:27,808 --> 00:42:31,696

Um, although when I was at my mom's girl

outta the car walking down the alleyway to

:

00:42:31,696 --> 00:42:39,798

get to her and it was slimy as fuck, like,

you know, mossy algae like path didn't

:

00:42:39,798 --> 00:42:44,461

realize I was wearing flip flops because

everyone went flip flops in November and

:

00:42:44,461 --> 00:42:49,528

slipped over and obviously you go into

massive pan rage over like her baby, and

:

00:42:49,574 --> 00:42:53,798

so you go, fuck me, it doesn't matter

if I die, but this baby must be safe.

:

00:42:54,217 --> 00:42:58,778

But like flipped down, scratched down my

foot, cracked down onto my knee, and then.

:

00:42:59,584 --> 00:43:03,002

Start falling back and went no, so

that took the brunt of it on my hip.

:

00:43:03,574 --> 00:43:06,839

She was actually fine She slept through

the whole thing And I was just like

:

00:43:06,900 --> 00:43:11,329

on the crumpled pile on the floor This

woman just walked past looking at me.

:

00:43:11,339 --> 00:43:12,727

She walked past and what a bitch.

:

00:43:12,788 --> 00:43:15,023

I was like, yep, don't worry Like

I just like sitting on the wet

:

00:43:15,023 --> 00:43:17,706

floor with my baby It's fine.

:

00:43:19,033 --> 00:43:20,227

Since I've got myself out

of my mind for a moment.

:

00:43:20,268 --> 00:43:22,982

So obviously your heart is like

pumping through your chest Like, boom,

:

00:43:22,982 --> 00:43:24,757

boom, boom, boom, because obviously

you're just like god that could

:

00:43:24,757 --> 00:43:28,497

have, you know, could have gone so

badly wrong But yeah, she's all good.

:

00:43:28,497 --> 00:43:29,905

I've now fucked my knee, it's really sore.

:

00:43:30,814 --> 00:43:32,354

This is my hip and toe.

:

00:43:32,997 --> 00:43:34,456

I think the bruises are on the way.

:

00:43:34,467 --> 00:43:37,446

I think they're gonna blossom

because I bruise very easily.

:

00:43:37,885 --> 00:43:39,303

And there were some pretty hefty hits.

:

00:43:40,660 --> 00:43:42,140

So that's gonna be a good look.

:

00:43:43,283 --> 00:43:45,405

I was actually unbruised

for the first time.

:

00:43:46,671 --> 00:43:47,263

Like ever.

:

00:43:49,548 --> 00:43:50,109

That didn't last long.

:

00:43:51,609 --> 00:43:53,538

Dan 1: So is that your

high and your low in one?

:

00:43:54,007 --> 00:43:55,262

Tilly: I don't think

it's that high and low.

:

00:43:55,548 --> 00:43:57,926

I mean it would have been low if

like she'd actually hurt herself.

:

00:43:58,426 --> 00:43:59,395

It was panicky.

:

00:43:59,446 --> 00:43:59,895

I wouldn't say it was a low.

:

00:44:00,155 --> 00:44:03,788

I had a low day the other day actually.

:

00:44:04,747 --> 00:44:06,533

So I had whole days for my good son Brad.

:

00:44:07,176 --> 00:44:09,064

And like Thursday, after she'd

had the tongue tie, that was

:

00:44:09,064 --> 00:44:10,186

all grand and everything.

:

00:44:10,727 --> 00:44:12,492

But I was just thinking I was

just quite tired that day.

:

00:44:12,513 --> 00:44:15,104

And just having, I don't know,

maybe it was just a low day.

:

00:44:15,288 --> 00:44:17,186

Dan 1: Well it was a big day for you.

:

00:44:17,319 --> 00:44:19,278

Like, you were out ten hours.

:

00:44:19,768 --> 00:44:22,798

You've got to remember that

you've kind of gone from basically

:

00:44:23,064 --> 00:44:24,370

being a walking incubator.

:

00:44:24,380 --> 00:44:25,472

Not on tongue tie day.

:

00:44:26,339 --> 00:44:27,023

Tilly: Not on Thursday.

:

00:44:27,104 --> 00:44:28,431

Oh, on Thursday, sorry, yeah.

:

00:44:29,007 --> 00:44:31,885

Um, we were only out for a

few hours, just getting a snip

:

00:44:31,885 --> 00:44:33,242

done, and then we came back.

:

00:44:33,263 --> 00:44:34,283

But yeah, I don't know.

:

00:44:34,660 --> 00:44:35,303

Low day.

:

00:44:35,650 --> 00:44:36,405

Just wandering around.

:

00:44:36,926 --> 00:44:38,691

At one point I was wandering

around Tesco's with her.

:

00:44:39,436 --> 00:44:41,242

Just because I was trying

to get to calm down.

:

00:44:42,222 --> 00:44:44,518

And I just kept almost crying

while picking up things.

:

00:44:44,609 --> 00:44:46,263

Oh, I know you didn't tell me about this.

:

00:44:47,038 --> 00:44:51,058

Well, you came home late, so,

and then the next day I was out.

:

00:44:51,773 --> 00:44:52,181

Yeah.

:

00:44:54,181 --> 00:44:58,548

Yeah, nothing particularly bad, just

feeling a bit like, just a bit shit.

:

00:44:58,558 --> 00:44:59,018

Flopsy.

:

00:44:59,018 --> 00:45:02,365

I was just like, uh, I'm

not doing a very good job.

:

00:45:03,854 --> 00:45:04,140

Yeah.

:

00:45:05,099 --> 00:45:05,640

It's too late.

:

00:45:06,875 --> 00:45:08,722

Felt like just not be doing very well.

:

00:45:10,089 --> 00:45:10,257

Dan 1: I think

:

00:45:10,257 --> 00:45:11,160

Tilly: we're doing an alright job.

:

00:45:11,161 --> 00:45:11,726

I think we are.

:

00:45:11,726 --> 00:45:13,844

It's just one of those days where

your head's in the wrong space.

:

00:45:14,120 --> 00:45:14,324

Yeah.

:

00:45:14,324 --> 00:45:14,681

Woke up

:

00:45:14,681 --> 00:45:15,620

Dan 1: yesterday felt grand.

:

00:45:16,640 --> 00:45:18,038

I think that's the weird thing, isn't it?

:

00:45:18,048 --> 00:45:20,793

That, like, you are just going to

have those days, irrespective of

:

00:45:20,793 --> 00:45:25,160

how well you're doing, where you

just kind of, the self doubt of, am

:

00:45:25,160 --> 00:45:26,667

I doing, am I doing an alright job?

:

00:45:26,667 --> 00:45:26,813

God,

:

00:45:26,813 --> 00:45:26,958

Tilly: yeah.

:

00:45:26,958 --> 00:45:29,732

And then throw in a hell

of a lot of sleep debt.

:

00:45:30,038 --> 00:45:30,446

Yeah.

:

00:45:30,691 --> 00:45:34,120

And, for me, massive hormonal

changes all the time.

:

00:45:36,722 --> 00:45:39,099

It's a potent mix.

:

00:45:39,885 --> 00:45:40,477

Dan 1: Definitely.

:

00:45:42,069 --> 00:45:46,135

I think my height I was thinking about

this the other day, and I was just kind

:

00:45:46,135 --> 00:45:50,870

of like, well actually I was thinking

about it today, I don't really appreciate

:

00:45:50,921 --> 00:45:54,339

how, not easy, but smooth it's been.

:

00:45:55,788 --> 00:46:01,533

Like, other than the tongue tie thing,

everything else has just been, you know,

:

00:46:01,533 --> 00:46:06,533

the labour and everything, it wasn't the

labour you wanted, but even though, like

:

00:46:06,533 --> 00:46:11,574

our recount of it sounds almost kind

of traumatic in terms of the stuff like

:

00:46:11,574 --> 00:46:14,533

the stitching, all these things aren't

really like, horrendous, they're just

:

00:46:15,278 --> 00:46:20,788

Could have been a bit of a inconvenience,

but there are, you know, some people,

:

00:46:21,013 --> 00:46:27,135

you know, like your friends Mm hmm have

some real Traumatic times with labor

:

00:46:27,135 --> 00:46:32,145

and then those being colicky, jaundice

y I mean, colic can still come for us.

:

00:46:32,237 --> 00:46:35,288

Yeah, it could still come for us,

but you know, we're doing well Count

:

00:46:35,288 --> 00:46:36,421

your blessings where you got them.

:

00:46:36,472 --> 00:46:41,217

Yeah, I agree And so I think, I think

I've kind of been trying to be a bit more

:

00:46:41,227 --> 00:46:43,553

Tilly: appreciative of that I think it's

important to count your blessings, I

:

00:46:43,553 --> 00:46:51,987

think, even when those times happen Yeah,

I think we're still incredibly lucky.

:

00:46:53,099 --> 00:46:54,160

You know, we've got each other.

:

00:46:54,436 --> 00:46:55,211

We love each other.

:

00:46:55,263 --> 00:47:00,079

We're supportive of each other Yeah, at

the moment we're not getting intimacy

:

00:47:00,079 --> 00:47:04,252

in our relationship Which you know,

it's hard because we're used to having

:

00:47:04,252 --> 00:47:06,171

that, you know We've been together

for almost nine years because we've

:

00:47:06,171 --> 00:47:07,303

never had a baby until this point.

:

00:47:07,334 --> 00:47:08,507

That's and it's

:

00:47:08,518 --> 00:47:10,548

Dan 1: something we both

really value Yeah, we

:

00:47:10,548 --> 00:47:12,007

Tilly: do both really value it.

:

00:47:12,007 --> 00:47:12,487

That's why it's nice.

:

00:47:12,487 --> 00:47:18,334

We've got like even that ten minutes of

cuddling this morning Yeah, and so that's

:

00:47:18,334 --> 00:47:20,456

a struggle, but we know that'll come back.

:

00:47:20,926 --> 00:47:24,158

We know it's only temporary And

it's just sort of a point that

:

00:47:24,158 --> 00:47:26,283

you have to accept of what it is.

:

00:47:27,120 --> 00:47:29,466

For the time, this isn't,

this isn't a time of lots of

:

00:47:30,263 --> 00:47:31,558

intimacy in our relationship.

:

00:47:32,701 --> 00:47:36,028

But we've got a strong relationship

that it will be, will be fine.

:

00:47:38,711 --> 00:47:41,120

I'm saying all this hoping

that you feel the same.

:

00:47:41,824 --> 00:47:42,579

Dan 1: No, I do.

:

00:47:42,691 --> 00:47:43,334

I do, yeah.

:

00:47:43,365 --> 00:47:46,895

I just, again, it's one of those things

that makes me want to push to try

:

00:47:46,895 --> 00:47:49,171

and get her to sleep better, sooner.

:

00:47:49,609 --> 00:47:51,518

So that we can have

her in that next to me.

:

00:47:52,038 --> 00:47:55,283

And then we can have more interesting,

you know, we can spoon while she's safe

:

00:47:55,283 --> 00:47:59,058

lying in the next to me as it were,

it's not, it's not suddenly kind of a

:

00:47:59,058 --> 00:48:04,018

case of, oh, you're on, or that it's

your turn, my turn, and then almost

:

00:48:04,018 --> 00:48:07,834

doing, because we effectively almost

have a relay, a night time of relays

:

00:48:07,834 --> 00:48:14,222

where the baton is the baby, and sleep

is so valuable that the idea of kind

:

00:48:14,222 --> 00:48:19,130

of waking up 15 minutes early so that

we can have a snuggle, Or vice versa.

:

00:48:20,528 --> 00:48:23,314

It's kind of a bit like, you

know, what's more important.

:

00:48:23,742 --> 00:48:26,079

Tilly: I mean, I'd happily take

a 15 minute cut for a snuggle.

:

00:48:27,548 --> 00:48:27,885

Yeah.

:

00:48:29,079 --> 00:48:29,722

I don't mind that.

:

00:48:30,007 --> 00:48:31,905

I don't really see if 15 minutes

is going to make no difference.

:

00:48:32,844 --> 00:48:37,130

So I'd definitely take a 15 minute

cut from my sleep for a snuggle time.

:

00:48:39,436 --> 00:48:39,987

Remember that.

:

00:48:40,130 --> 00:48:41,773

Have your little morning

erection poking me in the bum.

:

00:48:43,752 --> 00:48:44,660

That's what your huge morning erection.

:

00:48:46,120 --> 00:48:46,814

Gargantuan.

:

00:48:49,120 --> 00:48:50,334

Dan 1: It's going to make me blush in my

:

00:48:50,334 --> 00:48:50,824

Tilly: voice.

:

00:48:51,773 --> 00:48:55,854

And I think, now, I feel much

more comfortable with how she's,

:

00:48:55,895 --> 00:48:57,058

how she's eating and stuff.

:

00:48:57,599 --> 00:49:00,446

I think, you know, we can look

into going on a date and stuff.

:

00:49:01,620 --> 00:49:04,558

Dan 1: Yeah, I think that,

so, this is actually my low.

:

00:49:05,293 --> 00:49:10,793

Kind of trying to get, I've not

been great in the night feeds.

:

00:49:10,926 --> 00:49:13,538

I've struggled with trying

to get her to keep it down.

:

00:49:14,222 --> 00:49:20,599

And I think that, you know, if we were to

go on a date or something, who would it be

:

00:49:20,599 --> 00:49:24,130

that would bottle feed her and are they?

:

00:49:24,905 --> 00:49:25,395

Probably mum.

:

00:49:26,303 --> 00:49:31,191

Yeah, I guess mum's well enough experience

to have, it's been a while though

:

00:49:31,232 --> 00:49:32,599

since she's bottle fed a baby, no?

:

00:49:33,160 --> 00:49:34,461

No, she's not raising a little.

:

00:49:34,461 --> 00:49:35,380

Oh yeah, that's true.

:

00:49:35,380 --> 00:49:40,752

It's just she, so my low I guess is, is

the amount of times she's just been sick

:

00:49:40,763 --> 00:49:44,834

during the night just because you've kind

of just woken up from sleep or you're

:

00:49:44,905 --> 00:49:50,405

incredibly groggy and tired and you're

kind of dozing off while you're trying

:

00:49:50,405 --> 00:49:53,824

to feed her so you're Trying to find

something else that will stimulate you

:

00:49:53,834 --> 00:49:58,140

because just a bottle to a baby's face

isn't going to keep you awake So you

:

00:49:58,140 --> 00:50:00,946

put something on the telly or you've got

like Instagram on your phone or you got

:

00:50:00,946 --> 00:50:06,589

Pokemon the trading card game going they

need to sponsor me and Then you kind of

:

00:50:07,038 --> 00:50:10,150

but you're not but you're also too tired

to multitask You can't do that kind of

:

00:50:10,150 --> 00:50:14,007

half and half thing So you just end up

focusing on one and the next thing you go?

:

00:50:14,018 --> 00:50:16,028

Oh shit, how long have I

kind of given her the bottle?

:

00:50:16,028 --> 00:50:17,671

You take the bottle away.

:

00:50:17,987 --> 00:50:20,211

You kind of then do the

burping and stuff like that.

:

00:50:20,222 --> 00:50:23,038

She's not sick then so you're like

Oh, I'm in the clear You wait a

:

00:50:23,038 --> 00:50:25,752

little bit, she starts crying, you

go, okay, bottle feed her again.

:

00:50:27,058 --> 00:50:30,181

And then like 10 15 minutes later,

she's feeling really sleepy, like

:

00:50:30,181 --> 00:50:32,507

there was one moment where it was

actually quite worrying this week.

:

00:50:32,916 --> 00:50:36,028

She's kind of sleeping, and you go,

oh, okay, I'll go put her in the nest.

:

00:50:37,181 --> 00:50:40,334

She was in the nest, I came along, I

was like, okay, she's still sleeping.

:

00:50:40,354 --> 00:50:43,079

I laid down on the sofa, and the

next thing I heard was spluttering.

:

00:50:43,079 --> 00:50:45,528

I was like, that sounded a bit odd,

I should probably go check on her.

:

00:50:45,528 --> 00:50:49,324

And she'd just been sick, kind of all

down herself, and obviously sick whilst

:

00:50:49,324 --> 00:50:50,589

she was lying there and sleeping.

:

00:50:51,329 --> 00:50:56,666

And so I guess the, it's just kind

of, being better at those night

:

00:50:56,696 --> 00:51:02,053

time feeds in terms of, I think

the easy win is those, those pauses

:

00:51:02,053 --> 00:51:04,513

between certain amounts of feed.

:

00:51:05,074 --> 00:51:08,492

Like, you know, I'm doing,

I'm currently doing 10 minutes

:

00:51:08,492 --> 00:51:10,155

after every 30ml or something.

:

00:51:10,604 --> 00:51:14,717

And it does mean that, it even means

that, like after the first 30ml,

:

00:51:15,023 --> 00:51:19,339

she'll just scream at me, for, for

the 10 minutes until the next 30ml.

:

00:51:19,941 --> 00:51:23,431

And then after the second 30ml, she just

falls asleep, so you have to wake her.

:

00:51:24,155 --> 00:51:27,104

And that, that one is, I find

is more of a risk, because

:

00:51:27,166 --> 00:51:28,686

Tilly: Yeah, if she falls asleep,

don't you have to wake her?

:

00:51:29,033 --> 00:51:29,359

Dan 1: No.

:

00:51:29,451 --> 00:51:29,666

No.

:

00:51:30,778 --> 00:51:34,370

Okay, because I've found that the problem

can be that if I try and feed her,

:

00:51:34,737 --> 00:51:38,482

when she's not actively looking for a

feed Yeah, don't you have to do that?

:

00:51:38,798 --> 00:51:39,349

Oh, okay.

:

00:51:39,900 --> 00:51:42,655

I just assumed that, you know,

the feed sizes are meant to be

:

00:51:42,655 --> 00:51:43,247

Tilly: 90 to 120.

:

00:51:43,247 --> 00:51:45,319

There'll be a time when she feeds

more and a time when she feeds less.

:

00:51:45,737 --> 00:51:46,104

Yeah.

:

00:51:46,982 --> 00:51:48,084

You know, and then you give her a feed.

:

00:51:48,084 --> 00:51:49,941

But yeah, if she doesn't want it

all, don't you have to give it

:

00:51:49,941 --> 00:51:50,308

Dan 1: to her all?

:

00:51:51,145 --> 00:51:53,461

But yeah, I guess, I guess that's

the thing that I feel most guilty

:

00:51:53,472 --> 00:51:54,931

about, is when she's kind of sick.

:

00:51:56,574 --> 00:51:58,727

Tilly: I get that, I think

that's just, babies are sick.

:

00:51:59,737 --> 00:52:02,482

Yeah, I think, you know, babies are sick

just because she's not generally sick.

:

00:52:04,115 --> 00:52:05,237

I think we find it more shocking.

:

00:52:05,808 --> 00:52:07,839

Dan 1: Well, it's not just that,

if babies are meant to be eating

:

00:52:07,839 --> 00:52:11,145

every sort of two, three hours,

she'll be sick, but she won't.

:

00:52:11,155 --> 00:52:16,002

Alright, hopefully that'll help

decrease the, the vomiting.

:

00:52:16,002 --> 00:52:19,523

I've just gone also, I've

been also remembering to just

:

00:52:19,523 --> 00:52:21,441

always do one, the main feed.

:

00:52:21,676 --> 00:52:22,451

With Gavis gone in it?

:

00:52:22,492 --> 00:52:22,890

Tilly: Yeah.

:

00:52:23,237 --> 00:52:23,942

Yeah, I think that's fine.

:

00:52:24,007 --> 00:52:27,033

Infant G's gone generally if

I fed her before you get her

:

00:52:27,992 --> 00:52:29,890

Dan 1: and I'll always do

that one as a one 20 mil.

:

00:52:29,890 --> 00:52:31,451

'cause that's the

minimum for the G'S gone.

:

00:52:31,451 --> 00:52:31,543

Yeah.

:

00:52:32,431 --> 00:52:35,308

Tilly: And there's five hours

generally you are on shift.

:

00:52:35,548 --> 00:52:39,655

Yeah, she actually, she

might only have one feed.

:

00:52:39,931 --> 00:52:40,237

Yeah.

:

00:52:40,992 --> 00:52:42,982

And then when you hand her back

to me, I feed her straight away.

:

00:52:43,166 --> 00:52:46,451

'cause at that point my boobs are like

I need to feed her anyway popping.

:

00:52:47,104 --> 00:52:51,574

Um, and so I think that's

how you can focus on it.

:

00:52:52,635 --> 00:52:53,645

She's not stressing yourself out.

:

00:52:53,645 --> 00:52:54,808

And it's not like she's

underweight anymore.

:

00:52:55,206 --> 00:52:56,676

No, she's not losing weight,

she's gaining weight.

:

00:52:56,676 --> 00:52:58,513

Well that's alright.

:

00:52:59,385 --> 00:53:00,120

So what?

:

00:53:00,191 --> 00:53:01,385

Let's see, what was my funny?

:

00:53:01,385 --> 00:53:02,558

I can't find it.

:

00:53:04,579 --> 00:53:04,854

My brain's gone.

:

00:53:05,467 --> 00:53:08,354

Oh yeah, I was just trying to check if she

needed to have her nappy changed earlier.

:

00:53:08,711 --> 00:53:11,926

So, you know, I undid her baby groat,

just pulled her nappy to one side,

:

00:53:11,926 --> 00:53:16,038

but then as I was checking, she then

started firing loads of wee out at me.

:

00:53:16,844 --> 00:53:18,140

Firing it straight at you.

:

00:53:18,140 --> 00:53:18,630

Firing.

:

00:53:18,671 --> 00:53:19,641

It's quite, it's quite propulsion.

:

00:53:19,641 --> 00:53:20,997

Because normally when she

wheezes it's like a sort of,

:

00:53:21,487 --> 00:53:22,931

a sort of waterfall, isn't it?

:

00:53:22,931 --> 00:53:24,147

Like a little limp

:

00:53:24,147 --> 00:53:24,451

Dan 1: waterfall.

:

00:53:24,451 --> 00:53:26,997

Yeah, it just looks like

something's overflowing.

:

00:53:27,160 --> 00:53:27,426

Yeah.

:

00:53:27,426 --> 00:53:28,722

Like you filled your jug too much.

:

00:53:28,803 --> 00:53:31,171

Yeah, but this is quite a Really?

:

00:53:31,375 --> 00:53:32,405

Just gave it some power?

:

00:53:32,426 --> 00:53:33,007

Just gave it some willy.

:

00:53:33,120 --> 00:53:34,640

Showing off her pelvic floor to you?

:

00:53:35,028 --> 00:53:35,477

Yeah, just

:

00:53:35,507 --> 00:53:36,742

Tilly: like, hey, you don't

have this anymore mum.

:

00:53:37,232 --> 00:53:38,691

I destroyed this for you.

:

00:53:39,814 --> 00:53:41,548

I have started my pelvic

floor training this week.

:

00:53:42,089 --> 00:53:42,895

How are you finding that?

:

00:53:43,885 --> 00:53:47,120

I mean, depressing, in the sense

that I don't have any, anymore.

:

00:53:48,538 --> 00:53:51,467

Like, normally where I have used to,

like, I, well you know it's not true,

:

00:53:51,507 --> 00:53:52,936

it is there, but it's just so weak.

:

00:53:53,410 --> 00:53:54,992

Compared to what it used to be like.

:

00:53:54,992 --> 00:53:57,594

You doing sort of exercises, sort sort

of clenching and sort of see, should tell

:

00:53:57,594 --> 00:54:01,359

you, it's like imagine a blueberry out,

you know, opening of your vagina that you

:

00:54:01,359 --> 00:54:02,584

knew you're sucking this blueberry in.

:

00:54:04,349 --> 00:54:06,155

Dan 1: Yeah, I can't, I

just can't visualize that.

:

00:54:06,155 --> 00:54:10,104

Someone even said that supposedly you

do the same for men and it's like,

:

00:54:10,104 --> 00:54:12,523

it just wouldn't resonate with me

sucking a blueberry into my site.

:

00:54:12,773 --> 00:54:13,140

Well, I think

:

00:54:13,257 --> 00:54:15,645

Tilly: well often is they

said is imagining like you're

:

00:54:15,645 --> 00:54:16,778

stopping yourself mid flow.

:

00:54:16,839 --> 00:54:17,513

That's what it is.

:

00:54:17,513 --> 00:54:18,094

So like, well

:

00:54:18,094 --> 00:54:21,247

Dan 1: I actually practice that though on

the, when I'm wearing Yeah, that's good.

:

00:54:21,584 --> 00:54:24,278

But what's the difference between

that and like the key, isn't that

:

00:54:24,278 --> 00:54:25,839

also powered by your Kegel exercise?

:

00:54:27,104 --> 00:54:27,625

Tilly: I think it's all

:

00:54:27,839 --> 00:54:28,206

Dan 1: size.

:

00:54:29,176 --> 00:54:31,257

I think Chloe was correcting

me for someone else.

:

00:54:31,380 --> 00:54:33,125

I'm pretty sure it's

the same, but nevermind.

:

00:54:33,186 --> 00:54:35,421

Okay, so you're sucking

blueberries in your badge.

:

00:54:35,727 --> 00:54:36,615

Tilly: Yeah, I'm full of blueberries now.

:

00:54:37,242 --> 00:54:39,706

just, I just take a, literally

for some reason I can't wait.

:

00:54:40,686 --> 00:54:43,905

Yeah, so I, you like glute bridges and

things and sort of imagine like all,

:

00:54:43,905 --> 00:54:46,288

you all sort the tightening and sucking

and pulling in and you do it on your

:

00:54:46,288 --> 00:54:48,961

exhale, so as you sort of hold it in.

:

00:54:49,574 --> 00:54:55,441

Um, but yeah, you can definitely feel it,

like if it feels a bit sore afterwards.

:

00:54:55,456 --> 00:54:58,742

I'm not doing glute bridges and stuff,

which like, bodyweight glute bridges,

:

00:54:58,742 --> 00:55:03,456

generally not a challenge, but it's

a much more of a challenge now.

:

00:55:04,803 --> 00:55:07,507

Dan 1: So just so that people kind of

know, because obviously it's something

:

00:55:07,507 --> 00:55:10,538

that everyone hears about, but doesn't

really understand what's required.

:

00:55:10,569 --> 00:55:17,752

What, what is kind of the program to get

back, you know, to go from, from where

:

00:55:17,752 --> 00:55:19,701

you are to getting your pelvic floor back?

:

00:55:19,701 --> 00:55:21,314

Tilly: Well, I'm just starting.

:

00:55:21,395 --> 00:55:22,803

It's consistency like most things.

:

00:55:23,181 --> 00:55:23,354

But I

:

00:55:23,354 --> 00:55:26,334

Dan 1: mean, you've got a program now that

you've bought from somebody for something.

:

00:55:26,395 --> 00:55:26,824

Oh yeah.

:

00:55:27,140 --> 00:55:30,293

What's the kind of expectations

in that program for you?

:

00:55:31,150 --> 00:55:33,803

Tilly: Well in that program, for

like, it focuses on your pelvic floor

:

00:55:33,854 --> 00:55:35,895

and your abdominals particularly.

:

00:55:36,569 --> 00:55:39,497

But yeah, so the program that I

started on is, you know, your first

:

00:55:39,497 --> 00:55:42,528

week is just actually you practice it,

you're focusing on your breathing and

:

00:55:42,528 --> 00:55:44,028

how to breathe and engage properly.

:

00:55:44,181 --> 00:55:47,681

That's just the first week of practicing,

so like, how to breathe and engage

:

00:55:47,681 --> 00:55:49,987

your pelvic floor and core properly.

:

00:55:50,191 --> 00:55:53,763

And the next week you start moving

on to doing actual exercises.

:

00:55:53,763 --> 00:55:56,528

It's like three times a week you do

exercises to focus on strengthening

:

00:55:56,538 --> 00:55:58,579

your pelvic floor and your core.

:

00:56:00,048 --> 00:56:00,303

And how

:

00:56:00,303 --> 00:56:02,977

Dan 1: long was the pro how

long was the It's a five week.

:

00:56:03,171 --> 00:56:04,232

Oh, so it's five weeks.

:

00:56:04,232 --> 00:56:05,436

Okay, five weeks.

:

00:56:05,436 --> 00:56:06,895

And how many do you do a week?

:

00:56:06,895 --> 00:56:07,263

Three?

:

00:56:07,283 --> 00:56:09,456

Yeah, and how long's each workout

:

00:56:09,456 --> 00:56:09,793

Tilly: roughly?

:

00:56:10,140 --> 00:56:10,528

I don't know.

:

00:56:10,701 --> 00:56:11,834

I think they're probably

about half an hour.

:

00:56:12,048 --> 00:56:12,150

Oh,

:

00:56:12,150 --> 00:56:12,467

Dan 1: really?

:

00:56:12,507 --> 00:56:13,150

That's quite long.

:

00:56:13,395 --> 00:56:14,416

So it's a proper workout.

:

00:56:14,711 --> 00:56:19,120

It's not just kind of like specific

exercises for, okay I would have just

:

00:56:19,120 --> 00:56:22,579

assumed it was like five, ten minute

exercises that you do daily kind of thing.

:

00:56:23,191 --> 00:56:24,967

Tilly: I mean you do it alongside

other stuff, I think, because

:

00:56:24,967 --> 00:56:26,895

obviously you wouldn't want to

work out the rest of your body.

:

00:56:27,257 --> 00:56:29,679

And they'll do sort of like, you'll,

you'll do your corner, probably do a bit

:

00:56:29,679 --> 00:56:35,400

of your glute with that, and lower back

obviously, that's all that sort of area.

:

00:56:37,002 --> 00:56:39,155

But you'd need to do stuff

to work out the rest of your

:

00:56:39,155 --> 00:56:39,553

Dan 1: body.

:

00:56:40,421 --> 00:56:44,339

Speaking of which, six week check

ins next week some point, isn't it?

:

00:56:44,400 --> 00:56:45,400

No, week after.

:

00:56:45,400 --> 00:56:45,992

Week after, okay.

:

00:56:46,625 --> 00:56:48,125

Tilly: After your

birthday, it's that Monday.

:

00:56:48,166 --> 00:56:49,563

Garage to have our car serviced.

:

00:56:50,043 --> 00:56:52,359

Uh, see if that's when I can, if

the doctor will be like, yeah,

:

00:56:52,359 --> 00:56:53,278

you're all good and I can start

:

00:56:53,278 --> 00:56:53,900

Dan 1: exercising.

:

00:56:54,553 --> 00:56:59,900

Go back to doing them deadlifts,

them squats, them, you know, get

:

00:56:59,900 --> 00:57:01,472

back into your strongman routine.

:

00:57:01,482 --> 00:57:02,217

I want to see them.

:

00:57:02,247 --> 00:57:03,115

My strongman routine?

:

00:57:03,176 --> 00:57:05,023

Yeah, yeah, power cleans and all sorts.

:

00:57:06,104 --> 00:57:09,543

I want to get you back on

that powerlifting stage.

:

00:57:10,584 --> 00:57:10,747

Because

:

00:57:10,788 --> 00:57:11,921

Tilly: I've been there so many times,

:

00:57:11,951 --> 00:57:12,696

Dan 1: the powerlifting stage.

:

00:57:12,737 --> 00:57:17,461

No, I'm just joking because it's obviously

such a 180 from where you are now to go

:

00:57:17,513 --> 00:57:22,548

from kind of basically not being able

to do anything for, Over nine months,

:

00:57:22,589 --> 00:57:25,630

well, I guess you didn't realise you were

pregnant immediately, but what, seven

:

00:57:25,630 --> 00:57:33,283

months, at minimum at least, and then to

being, yeah, to then being active will

:

00:57:33,283 --> 00:57:34,834

be quite an interesting one to go back.

:

00:57:34,834 --> 00:57:37,926

Tilly: Yeah, yeah, because

obviously I just, I felt so rough

:

00:57:37,926 --> 00:57:38,977

at the beginning of the pregnancy.

:

00:57:40,171 --> 00:57:43,416

I didn't do anything, and then

afterwards, I felt too knackered, and

:

00:57:43,507 --> 00:57:45,814

I was always quite scared throughout

the whole pregnancy, because of

:

00:57:45,875 --> 00:57:47,273

our miscarriage that we had before.

:

00:57:47,283 --> 00:57:51,497

I was always quite scared to do

exercise, even though I know it's

:

00:57:51,497 --> 00:57:55,885

fine, there's still parts of me that's

like, oh, you know, push up, you know.

:

00:57:56,069 --> 00:57:56,446

That's it.

:

00:57:56,977 --> 00:58:01,160

Neuroticisms, but a large part of my

training now is I want to train ready

:

00:58:01,160 --> 00:58:05,242

for our next pregnancy So if we know

we'd like to have another baby that we

:

00:58:05,242 --> 00:58:10,293

would you know, not for like a couple

of years, but Want to get my body strong

:

00:58:10,303 --> 00:58:14,895

because now for my last in this pregnancy,

I know what areas suffer Yeah And so

:

00:58:14,895 --> 00:58:17,722

I want to make sure I strengthen those

ready for it So like really working on

:

00:58:17,722 --> 00:58:23,048

like my posterior chains like my back and

my glutes and my pop it ass Absolutely.

:

00:58:23,201 --> 00:58:23,977

Give that big ass.

:

00:58:24,048 --> 00:58:26,395

And like my hip flexors because my

hips got really sore didn't they?

:

00:58:26,691 --> 00:58:29,569

Yeah being tall It's longer levers

your hips suffer a lot more.

:

00:58:29,589 --> 00:58:33,365

So I make sure I work on that

strengthening that quite a lot so the next

:

00:58:33,365 --> 00:58:38,130

time My body, hopefully, better equipped.

:

00:58:38,569 --> 00:58:41,548

I don't know, I don't have any scatch

hat from this week, I don't think.

:

00:58:42,609 --> 00:58:44,324

Dan 1: No, okay, so we're

ready for the public story.

:

00:58:44,324 --> 00:58:44,548

SCATCH

:

00:58:45,058 --> 00:58:45,273

Tilly: HATS!

:

00:58:47,946 --> 00:58:48,620

Scatchy boobs.

:

00:58:50,007 --> 00:58:52,242

Dan 1: Okay, here we go, from

the lovely people of Reddit.

:

00:58:52,334 --> 00:58:54,252

This is from charluckapants.

:

00:58:56,405 --> 00:59:01,426

So, he says, Okay, we've been pretty

lucky so far with the occasional blowout.

:

00:59:01,620 --> 00:59:02,711

And that's on us.

:

00:59:02,967 --> 00:59:05,160

We sized up diapers before she was ready.

:

00:59:05,497 --> 00:59:08,375

But when my nephew was a baby,

he had projectile diarrhea.

:

00:59:08,701 --> 00:59:11,436

On the walls, curtains, everything.

:

00:59:11,895 --> 00:59:13,467

My sister's That's some real force.

:

00:59:13,487 --> 00:59:14,293

Yeah, yeah.

:

00:59:14,701 --> 00:59:18,018

My sister's dog came in

and started eating it.

:

00:59:19,099 --> 00:59:24,058

My brother in law took the dog downstairs

to clean his mouth and brush his teeth.

:

00:59:25,069 --> 00:59:29,681

And at that point, the dog

vomited the poop back up on him.

:

00:59:29,758 --> 00:59:31,698

Oh, that's rough,

:

00:59:31,698 --> 00:59:32,992

Tilly: isn't it?

:

00:59:33,380 --> 00:59:34,390

That's a rough day.

:

00:59:34,451 --> 00:59:34,594

He

:

00:59:34,594 --> 00:59:36,849

Dan 1: ends it with literally

something from a sitcom.

:

00:59:37,308 --> 00:59:39,186

That is just, yeah, can you imagine?

:

00:59:39,186 --> 00:59:44,268

You're like, oh no, poor

baby's got projectile diarrhea.

:

00:59:44,808 --> 00:59:45,859

Let's try and clean that up.

:

00:59:45,870 --> 00:59:47,155

You're going to be feeling real bad.

:

00:59:47,217 --> 00:59:48,553

You're going to be

hurrying around, scared.

:

00:59:48,768 --> 00:59:51,410

You're going to be that mixture

of kind of feeling guilty but

:

00:59:51,410 --> 00:59:52,625

pissed off at the same time.

:

00:59:53,339 --> 00:59:56,431

and then your dog starts eating it

that just elevates that kind of guilt

:

00:59:56,431 --> 01:00:01,206

and pissed off because you're like oh

my dog shouldn't eat diarrhoea yeah

:

01:00:01,247 --> 01:00:05,359

and disgusted and then you go to clean

it and then you just and then i guess

:

01:00:05,390 --> 01:00:07,737

you stop feeling guilty once your dog

vomits on you you're just going to

:

01:00:07,747 --> 01:00:12,176

be fully pissed off and disgusted at

that point what a rollercoaster of

:

01:00:12,176 --> 01:00:13,472

an afternoon that would have been a

:

01:00:14,308 --> 01:00:16,298

Tilly: yeah i'm really glad to fight he's

not showing an interest in eating the

:

01:00:16,298 --> 01:00:20,747

Dan 1: poo yet oh he has every time

she poos when i'm changing i can tell

:

01:00:20,747 --> 01:00:22,283

when it's Oh, he does come near, yeah.

:

01:00:22,283 --> 01:00:25,599

He comes over and really digs his nose

in to try and smell what's going on.

:

01:00:25,599 --> 01:00:32,232

He's not tried to eat it as per se,

but he's incre I've started to kind

:

01:00:32,232 --> 01:00:36,222

of know when it's a poo, because he

really He piques an interest, yeah.

:

01:00:36,232 --> 01:00:40,416

He rummages his head as far into her nappy

as he can get it, to the point that I'm

:

01:00:40,416 --> 01:00:41,946

probably like, that's a bit invasive, pup.

:

01:00:41,987 --> 01:00:43,446

Let's move your head out of there.

:

01:00:44,548 --> 01:00:45,211

Tilly: Yes, pretty much.

:

01:00:45,211 --> 01:00:46,232

You've got to learn to be a bit gentle.

:

01:00:46,814 --> 01:00:47,385

Yeah.

:

01:00:48,191 --> 01:00:49,752

She got to meet mum's dogs this week.

:

01:00:49,752 --> 01:00:50,380

She did, yeah.

:

01:00:50,380 --> 01:00:51,008

Nancy and Sid.

:

01:00:51,008 --> 01:00:53,938

Nancy was licking your face and your

ear and she quite liked it actually.

:

01:00:53,938 --> 01:00:54,984

She gave a little giggle.

:

01:00:54,984 --> 01:00:55,402

Did she?

:

01:00:55,402 --> 01:00:58,541

Well, not a giggle, but like, you

know, like a little Aw, I missed that.

:

01:00:58,541 --> 01:00:59,378

Um, I was like,

:

01:00:59,378 --> 01:01:00,424

Dan 1: oh, she quite liked it.

:

01:01:00,424 --> 01:01:00,843

And then

:

01:01:00,843 --> 01:01:02,726

Tilly: Sid just sat there watching

her because Sid absolutely

:

01:01:02,726 --> 01:01:03,773

loved anything that's a baby.

:

01:01:06,691 --> 01:01:08,609

Farty, farty

:

01:01:08,609 --> 01:01:08,722

Dan 1: girl.

:

01:01:08,773 --> 01:01:11,222

I've been farting as well, so she must

have enjoyed the little rumblings.

:

01:01:11,222 --> 01:01:12,211

Have them on quietly.

:

01:01:12,650 --> 01:01:13,885

Or do you just pop off, don't you?

:

01:01:13,885 --> 01:01:14,599

Yeah,

:

01:01:15,803 --> 01:01:17,263

Tilly: she doesn't have any

embarrassment about it yet.

:

01:01:19,314 --> 01:01:19,916

So she shouldn't.

:

01:01:20,405 --> 01:01:22,375

We've probably blabbed on enough

for this week, haven't we?

:

01:01:22,681 --> 01:01:24,303

Dan 1: Thank you very much, lovely people.

:

01:01:24,436 --> 01:01:25,160

Yeah,

:

01:01:25,171 --> 01:01:27,711

Tilly: it's been, it's been

an interesting old week.

:

01:01:27,773 --> 01:01:29,364

My boobies are starting to

feel a bit full, so I reckon I

:

01:01:29,365 --> 01:01:30,569

should be up for a feed soon.

:

01:01:30,752 --> 01:01:31,120

Laters.

:

01:01:31,252 --> 01:01:31,742

Cheerio.

:

01:01:32,844 --> 01:01:33,232

Bye.

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Show artwork for Blabbering: Babies!
Blabbering: Babies!
A week by week glimpse into a couple stumbling through starting parenthood

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